A remedy to help notorious procrastinators

Hi there, 

There are lots of things we really should be doing, but we’re not. People often tell me that in response to this newsletter: Great idea. Just can’t seem to do it.

My advice? Get someone to help you out. 

Here’s what works for me:

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Find yourself a partner in crime. This is someone you speak with every week, taking just a few minutes to ask each other about priorities and plans. It’s something I’ve been doing since 2014, and talks with my partner have become a key part of all projects I’m involved in, big and small.

Every week, usually first thing Tuesday or Wednesday morning, Derk and I have a 30-minute video call. At top speed, we run through the following 5 questions:  

1. What went well last week and why?

2. What could you have done better?

3. What are you doing for balance and downtime?

4. What are you doing to be a better partner and parent?

5. What concrete actions will you take next week?

We both prepare for our talk by writing down ahead of time what we want to share. We take turns talking: 15 minutes apiece. The other person sums up on the spot what’s being said in a shared Google Doc, asking the occasional question to clarify. If I’m not prepared or if I’m giving superficial answers, then I’m sure to hear about it. 

That’s it! Simple. Short. And super-effective.

Yet I’ve noticed the people around me show some reluctance to start a partnership like this. Mostly I hear it’s hard to find a suitable partner. Makes sense, because it’s not just anything you’ll be talking about, it’s your hopes and plans and struggles. Here are some pointers to help you get going:

• Scan your network. It might seem easiest at first to ask one of your closest friends. But that can mean your conversations get sidetracked more easily. It’s not at all required to be good friends with your partner in crime. In fact, more distance can give you a fresh perspective. So take a good look at your contacts on LinkedIn, for instance. Anyone you’d like to try an experiment with? Derk and I really only knew each other professionally when we got started. 

• Select by stage of life, not field or profession. While it’s nice if your partner in crime gets what you do, I’ve found it’s more helpful if you’re both in roughly the same stage of your lives or careers. 

• Don’t limit yourself by location. We’ve always had our talks remotely and Derk lives in a completely different part of the country. Not a problem in our Zoom/Skype/Facetime world.

• Try three sessions to start. Think of it as a trial period. If it doesn’t work out, you two can always leave it at that.

• Start even smaller. You could skip the questions you’re uncomfortable asking. Or don’t meet every week at first, but every other week or once a month.

These talks can be an incredibly powerful tool. They keep me on track and focused on what’s important to me. It’s weird, really, that more people I know don’t reap the benefits of having regular chats like this. Or maybe I’m the weird one. Don’t think so, but let me hear from you: Could this work for you? What’s holding you back? Maybe I can help you get started.

Have a good week,

Rick