Self-reflection. It’s the path to smarter choices
Hi there,
We’re all sometimes guilty of running running running to keep up with our lives. And not pausing to look back and see where we’ve been or where we want to go.
Taking the time to reflect is at the heart of my method. I’ve got the Friday recap each week, which is a great way to head into the weekend. Then there’s making time at the end of each quarter to look back and take stock. And perhaps my favorite: getting away for a few days each year to an actual cloister.
All of these moments for reflection are ways to take insight from your past and make it part of your present practice.
Reflection starts with making time for your own thoughts and writing down what you think. But there’s more to it. Deciding whether you’re satisfied with what you’ve achieved, for instance. Or picking what parts you’d ditch next time and what things are keepers.
Today: Meaningful reflection and what it can do for you.
Get yourself some data
If you want new insight, good information is essential.
Our brains are incredibly selective memory machines, and before you know it, you’ve forgotten key data points along the way.
But no need to make this harder than it has to be. Just take more notes as you go.
Make the threshold for writing things down (or typing) as low as possible. I use Day One for journaling and my own energy tracker software for tracking how I feel from day to day. (This is a GRIP membership feature, currently in Dutch only.)
Ask questions that lead to new experiments
Don’t shy away from asking questions like How do I see my role in the meeting that derailed? Once you’ve looked at the issue head on, be careful not to get stuck in self-criticism. Try to find ways to experiment instead. What will you try next time? Reflection is looking back to inform your future self. It gets easier once you let go of the idea that you can change what’s happened.
For me, reflection always starts out with simple questions: How do I honestly look back on this? What can I learn from what happened? What will I do differently next time?
And then more broadly: Let’s say anything’s possible. How would I then approach a situation like this in the future? What would that person I admire do?
This question often helps me too: How will I see this in 5 or 10 years? It transports me to another, often clarifying, perspective on the matter.
Let life’s time limits work *for* you
In the last two issues of Work in Progress (here and here), I brought up our finite time on the planet. Because time limits can work for you.
Nietzsche, with his eternal recurrence, added another dimension to thinking about the limits of our lives. His thought experiment goes like this:
Imagine you had to continually relive your life just the way it’s happened. Your life on repeat, an endless loop. Every moment, every event is exactly the same as it was the first time around. For hundreds of years, you’d experience the same joy and the same pain again and again.
Would that change how you see the past? What insights does this give you for the days and weeks ahead?
Choose reflection
In a noisy world, it takes courage to find the quiet. But that’s exactly what we need if we’re to sit down and take a good look at our own actions.
Examining your own behavior isn’t easy. And there are all kinds of distractions that keep us from even trying. I run up against that too, especially now that I live with a toddler and a new baby. It’s clear that taking the time to reflect means there are other things I can’t do.
The answer? Choose deliberately. That’s something I don’t always do, so this is a nudge for myself – and hopefully for you, too – to make the power of reflection a part of your life.
Have a good week,
Rick
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